‘There once was a man who prayed every single night to his god. Every single night without fail he would say “please lord, help me to win the lottery”, finally, exasperated, his God replied, “how am I to help you win if you have never once entered”.’
This is one of my favourite moral teaching stories, and sometimes I have to remind myself of its meaning: If you never enter the race you will never win. Even if you do enter the race, it may take a thousand tries before you win, but still, winning is possible. I think that one of the biggest assets a person can have is to maintain their confidence, to try and to keep on trying. I reminded myself of this recently before creating this blog; I asked myself what my dream job would be and honestly, one of my answers was full time blogging. I have always wanted to be self-employed, to run my own schedule and to try out and write about things that I love and better yet to be paid to do it. The thing is, I wasn’t doing it. For the average person, no matter what you want to do in your career or even in your personal life, no one is going to walk up to you in the street and offer it to you on a plate. If I didn’t at least start a blog, and put myself out there within the grasps of possible failure, judgement and quite possibly embarrassment, then I was never going to achieve what I wanted. Yes, there is a very high chance that I still won’t, I’m aware that there are thousands if not millions of girls who have the same dream as I do, but if I didn’t enter the race I was never, ever going to win. I have always been so scared of failure, to a point where on occasion it has stopped me from even trying, but it is so important to ignore the negative thoughts and to do things for yourself without worrying about what others will think or how stupid you could look. I know that no matter what I write and no matter how strangers judge it there are people who will support me, and I’d damn sure rather try and know I enjoyed the process and gave it my best shot than lay on my death bed wondering how my life could have turned out if only… No regrets for me thank you.
Recently I’ve actively spent more time for myself, making goals and lists of things that I might like to do, both professionally and personally, so that my life becomes more structured and I have things to look forward to. Completing things as simple as adding to lists which I’m already looking forward to ticking off and writing things down on paper really make my goals seem less like day dreams and more like could be realities. I love the process of scribbling things down in a notebook, researching them on my iPad or MacBook and then adding them into my dairy and making them a reality. This year seems to have flown by, but I have started this blog as a hobby, a project, and as something that I have full creative control over, which is something I’ve missed. I also have plans to complete my university course which I started a couple of years ago but had to put on hold, and I have so many places in the world that I want to visit, not to mention that I’m furiously saving to buy my first house.
Sometimes I have to fuel myself with motivation to run my life rather than letting it run me. I imagine if JK Rowling had wanted to write that book but didn’t believe in herself enough to. Imagine if even after writing it she wasn’t confident enough in herself or her work to push for it and bounce back after the initial publishers turned her away. JK Rowling now has more money than the Queen, she’s positively affected the lives of millions of children and their families and there are even Harry Potter worlds in London and Florida which were inspired by her stories and imagination. I know that this is an extreme example and this level of success won’t happen to everyone that simply tries, but it certainly won’t happen to anyone that doesn’t. Trying is not lame, and its okay to try and to fail, because I promise you its better than never trying at all.
I know all of this may be easier said than done and some goals require such hard work or financial commitment and there are all kinds of obstacles in the way sometimes, but, and I’m going to be cliche here; life’s too short. If you want that job but think you’re slightly under-qualified apply anyway, whats the worst that can happen? They won’t give you the job or they could appreciate your ambition and train you up. If you want to go on that once in a lifetime holiday then hustle until you have enough money to go! Most of the time the limits are purely how much effort you are willing to put into it. I know that in reality not everything is possible, if it were I would have seen a lot more places and I’d own a lot more things. What I’m saying, is visualise what you want, put it on to paper, write a bucket list or your yearly goals, start a saving pot or open up a savings account and use that money just for your goals. Then you can prioritise… one, two, three goals at the top of your list depending on how big they are, and really focus on working towards them. Once you’ve ticked those off you can start working your way down, and before you know it you might be achieving more than you ever thought you could.
I’m proud of my work ethic and although I have a long way to go to achieve all my goals, I’m working through them and have been on some amazing holidays, had some lovely experiences and own a few things Mulbury purse I’m looking at you that I really lusted over. In my eyes that makes me lucky and whether I win or lose, I’m happy to be the girl that tried.